I personally don’t like to fly. It's not that I think flying is dangerous, because I know it's not. It's the crashing part that's dangerous. I've only flown once, and it was with Delta. I went up to the counter at the airport and told the agent that I wanted to purchase a round trip ticket, and she asked me, where to? And I said, “I want a round ticket back here, lady. Why in the hell would I want a round ticket back to somewhere else? Then she mentioned something about pre-boarding, and I asked “Are you trying to tell me that I have to board the plane, before I board the plane?” After we got that mess straightened out, she gave me my boarding pass and flight number. When I checked, none of the numbers on the side of any plane matched my flight number. After much frustration, I finally found the plane, boarded it, and fell asleep. I dreamed that I was back inside the airport, and I noticed that all the machines that sell life insurance in the terminal were completely sold out. Then, as people boarded the plane, they were being asked to chip in for a little gas. Just before takeoff, I heard the automatic co-pilot yelling at the ground crew to "get those damn cows off the runway." Then, a flight attendant announced, “Everyone remain seated and please fasten your velcro. As I looked out the window and saw the ground crew pull the steps away, the plane started rocking. As the plane took off, the soothing, reassuring voice of the pilot said; Ladies and gentlemen, this is your automatic pilot. In my modern and carefully tested system, an error is absolutely impossible, absolutely impossible, absolutely impossible, absolutely impossible.