Not me. Let me explain...
We have 5 kids and they are on the 12th grandchild (only two of them were married thus far) and now our 23 yr old son just got married this past weekend so we have more in the works hopefully.
In the process of the wedding my sister brought my parents down to AZ from OR. Dad is about to turn 83 and mom just turned 80. We went up and surprised her with a party over Memorial weekend. Yes, she survived the surprise.
Having just seen them less than two months ago, and a total of 4 times the the past year, I can see my Dad really going down hill. And he knows it as well. When leaving on Tuesday he told the kids this was probably the last time he would see any of them.
Besides the Diabetes, which isn't controlled by just diet anymore, he has blood pressure and now heart problems. It wants to just race and not slow down. While here he wanted to go see the Fire Fighters Memorial where the 19 Hot Shots died. He was a city fire fighter for 30 years. He was so anxious that his blood pressure went through the roof for two days until he got to the site, then it came back down.
Knowing that I am getting older just makes parents even more so. I know, I am very lucky to have had them around for this long. I also know death comes to all sometime. That doesn't really make it easier when you see your parents fading into history.
Once again I am reminded, Family Time Is NEVER Wasted Time. No amount of money, praise for work well done, titles, or certifications can ever replace lost time with parents or children. Keep your priorities straight. Maybe we will be even more pleased with the hope of the next generation.
Have a Great Day, Brent
Amen Brent! I wish I could get more time with my kids. Finding a good balance seems to be a life long project!
Great words!
I have spent far too much of my life chasing the money and now realise I have missed out on my families life so much....!
To day is my Mothers birthday, she will be 81, I am over 5000 miles away and will have to settle for a phone call. Next week is my wedding anniversary...I shall miss that as well!
Ouch!
Aug 6th is our 36th anniversary. I will be 100 miles away during the day, but home that night and both weekends on each side of it. We went to HI last year and did a family reunion up in Lake Tahoe for our 35th.
Have a Great Day, Brent
Used to chase that dream of big money, did it, had it, got tired of it, went to work for a place as a welder now am the machinist, not making near the money that I could but after fifteen years there I would not change anything because I've been home with my wife and kids. By the way we just celebrated our 28th at the Oregon coast. Well worth not having the wealth
Been there more than once for an anniversary; OR coast. Some pretty nice places all the way from S to N. Lincoln City was always one of our favorites. But, Tillamook, Astoria, Depot Bay, Inn at Otters Crest, and so many others. You have to go there to understand. And the people, I don't think I ever met a stranger along the OR coast. But then, it could just be me, I start a lot of conversations.
Congrats on the anniversary.
Have a Great Day, Brent
I prefer Seaside OR, myself.
Well said Brent. My folks are younger, but just got divorced after 41 years, 4 kids, a successful business, and several tragedies. I see my mother every few months, and every time she ages years. I've lost loved ones, and it sucks. I always feel like I could have done more. Sorry for your situation.
The only thing I can say is that those of us who make it past 40 have really lived a life already. My 86 year old grandmother just healed up from a triple bypass. She told me before the surgery that if she were to die on the table I should celebrate. She explained that her life was full. She survived the holicost, and came to America and made a life. She was right, to make it that far in life is a victory. I never thought about mortality that way before we almost lost her. I was speechless about her courage for awhile.
Some of us have an easy life! When you think or are made to think about those who enabled our lifestyle, it's quite humbling!
Well said Brent. My Grandpa was 84 when he passed about three years ago. When we saw him back home he said the same thing when I told him we'd be back up next summer. "Well", he said, "maybe I'll be around". They just know it seems. He was ready though from hearing him talk. He was to tired, to old, couldn't do much of anything. Seems he had made peace with his maker sort of speak.
For me it was sad but enlightening. He told me one time before we left, "I've been here long enough". He had started smoking again and told the doctor that he was going to continue to smoke because he liked it. He was eating chocolate cake again, against the doctors wishes but was going to die happy.
I look back at how he handled things in the end and I admire him. It's hard to see and watch. I have an Aunt in her early 70's, Mom is getting up there in her late 60's. I know how you feel. Hopefully he will be around a while longer. I told my Grandpa this as well and I think he just said, "We'll see". I don't think he was to thrilled about trying hard to do it though.
Hopefully your Dad will be around for a good while. I guess the thing is, is he happy? I know my Grandpa was happy. He fired up a smoke and it was like a slice of heaven for him after 20 years of not smoking. Chocolate cake and he was like a kid in a candy store.
When I stare at that scary old man I see in the mirror I realize what my daddy told me years ago.
At 40 it starts hurting, at 45 it starts falling off and at 55 things start leaking!
I lost my daddy just over 3 years ago and he was 79. Spent his life in the oilfields and had a exposed stenosis that made his life miserable. I made him move in with me and I asked him what he wanted. He wanted to be able to see his second grandson finish his senior year football season with the University of Houston. I spent 6 months taking him to a pain specialist in Lubbock and physical therapy here at the local hospital. He saw every game my nephew played in. We had Christmas together with my brothers family and two weeks later he contracted pneumonia and passed away 4 weeks later.
My daddy taught me how to get up every day and go to work. And while he did not understand how I make a living, he respected I made a good life for my family. I do have some regrets about all the time I spent away from my family, but I did what I had to do to put a roof over their heads and food on the table. How or what I did is irrelevant now. We do not get to live life over. We only get to live in the present and the future.
I do get to hear my daddy's laugh when I talk to my brother and he looks like him more an more.
Me, I favor my mom and her family side. Course I was a disappointment to my mother, she wanted me to be a Pentecostal tent evangelist.
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