So, forgive my while I reminisce for a moment leading up to my point:

Dad is 84 years old.  Been a farmer all his life.  A fire fighter in the Air Force during Korea and a little after.  A fire fighter at a small urban department on the outskirts of Portland, OR for 30 years as chief engineer (drove the trucks, trained drivers, etc).  Drove semi tractor trailer livestock trucks, etc.  Mom and Dad will celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary next July 30th, one week before my wife and I celebrate our 38th.

A couple of years ago, when my wife and I were celebrating our 35th anniversary, we had a family reunion at Lake Tahoe.  My sister brought my folks down from the family farm on the foothills of Mt Hood in their car.  Dad insisted on driving a couple of times and scared my sister to death.  None of us realized how bad he had gotten.  So, we had a private talk one evening but mainly centered around him taking any more trips with the truck and 36' 5th wheel.  Actually, he said something that sparked the conversation.  It was agreed he couldn't do it anymore and he and mom asked us if the trailer would help me with my inspections as I am gone from home so much.  We said we would think about that because my wife and I had talked about a trailer but didn't really think we wanted that style. 

A couple of weeks later dad calls and says they are getting ready to hook up to the trailer and bring it down to us.  I said, "Dad, we talked about that.  You know you can't do it."  He says, "Oh, I think I got one more trip in me."  I couldn't talk him out of it.  So, when I got off the phone I told my wife to get packed we were headed for OR.  We left on Saturday at noon on Labor Day weekend and got there Sunday morning (22 hours straight through, I'm too old for those kinds of trips, thankfully we also had our then 20 yr old son with us. He turned around and drove straight through back down with the car).  We had quite a family discussion and dad, to his credit without a lot of arguing and fighting, realized his driving was scaring all of us and that he just couldn't do it anymore.  My wife and I used his truck and brought the trailer back to AZ then got the truck back to them.  He wasn't ready to let go of that yet and they still owed money on it. 

So, #1, he lost the trailer and a way of life they had enjoyed for many years. 

#2, His eyes no longer serve him well and surgeries don't work, cataracts and glaucoma, and just plain old.  He gave up driving, willingly. 

This Sept we went up there over Labor Day to help clean things up.  Sheds were quite a disaster after over 50 years of accumulation.  Didn't quite finish everything I wanted and we decided we would go back at Thanksgiving.  Also decided, when we found out they couldn't sell the truck for what they owed as they had used it to secure a loan to pay off the trailer before we took it, that we would sell our truck and buy theirs.  Mine was a 3/4 ton and not set up for a 5th wheel and his is a 1 ton and already all set up to handle the trailer.  So I sold my truck for just under what they still owed and sent the money to their bank and paid off their truck.   We got our tickets to fly up over Thanksgiving, work on the things I didn't finish before, and then drive the truck home. 

#3, He is losing his truck. 

In October on his 84th birthday the family up in OR got together and gave him a very nice walker.  Took to it without any problems and is enjoying some added security and mobility.  He and Mom go to a gym in town twice a week and a trainer helps him with standing up straight and walking with his feet straight instead of like a lame duck and dragging his feet.  Was doing pretty good. 

But, #4, is using a walker.  Willingly, but makes him feel even more like an OLD MAN. 

Well, now my point, yesterday, the day after Veteran's Day, he had a stroke.  I'm 100 miles from home in Phoenix on a job when I got the call.  A week and a half before I'm scheduled to fly up for Thanksgiving. 

I would really appreciate your prayers.  For decisions about when and if to leave and go up.  For the doctors to make sure if he is okay all things considered.  For my Mom for peace that God is in control.  And all the other things that go with times like this.

They did an MRI today but I haven't heard anything yet.  They may move him into a private room instead of ICU.  They said he is doing considerably better.  But, I'm sure some of you can relate, do you know how bad I'm going to feel if I hesitate too long and he dies?  But Mom and my sister keep saying he's fine and just wait until our scheduled trip.  The doctors don't seem that concerned. 

I know, it can go either way and it could have just been the end without a stroke so with no warning at all I couldn't have been there.  I know, God is in Control and I did just see him in Sept and we talk often by phone.  I know, he could last another 10 years. 

So WHAT!  Family Time Is Never Wasted Time.  That used to be in my signature line here, after we lost a 2 year old grandson in an accident. 

When and how does one know it's time to just drop everything and go anyway?  No matter how positive it looks that he will pull through. 

Okay, I'm done.  Feels better just to put it down and tell someone.  Thanks for being a sounding board.

He Is In Control, Have a Great Day,  Brent

He'll be in my prayer this evening.

Al

Man, you guys are great.  Someone out there must really be in touch with God.

Mom brought Dad home this evening.  Of course, she has already found out she may have been a little premature in that move. 

On one hand, the stroke was worse than they were telling me.  On the other hand, he has pulled through pretty well.  He talks fairly plain, drawback being sometimes it is the unconscious part of the brain controlling the mouth so that while he is thinking one thing, his mouth is saying something else completely.  Leg muscles are weak but doctors expect pretty good return over the next 3-6 months.  Well, for 84 and already down.

They caught it really soon but the MRI revealed he has actually had 4 over the past couple of years.  Not unusual from what I hear.  The others were really small but it explains some of the memory, speech, and physical deterioration.  Mom just put it to dementia but when he went out the door Wednesday afternoon to do something not dressed for the cold and saying something totally different than what she knew he was going to do she called the hospital and my sister and took him in right then.  Good thing as it was the stroke. 

Mom said they are both having to go through adjustments to how they communicate to not offend each other and hopefully be able to patiently understand each other.  

They both assured me they need this time of adjustment and that while they would love to see us and have some help they would rather we wait and come as scheduled so they can be prepared and recovered as much as possible. 

Thanks guys for all the comments, concerns, and prayers (please don't stop these).  Be assured, none of my hesitation was MONEY.  There were many things at play both down here and up there.  My wife and I were about to go this weekend and stay the extra week but now we are going to return to original plan 'A'. 

And boy do we have thanks to be giving this year.  And hopefully, next year's 60th anniversary party will still be on.  Praise The Lord. 

I hope yours isn't this extreme, but...take a breath, look around, count your blessings and give thanks to HIM who showers us with so much more than we deserve. 

He Is In Control, Have a Great Day,  Brent

I want to send out a great big THANK YOU to all of you who sent regards and especially prayers.  Each in his own way, and even if it was only once when you first read this.  It all counts.  God hears our hearts and the Holy Spirit is our mediator to make sure even what we can't put into words but is from our heart gets put through loud and clear.

It is really good to know that our industry does have so many who believe in God even if, as in welding areas, we don't agree 100% in the application of our beliefs. 

And good to know so many others who haven't really put together a belief system for themselves in the area of God, Heaven, salvation, etc, will still be considerate of our beliefs and in times of need will keep one another in their hearts with truly heart felt compassion and sympathy. 

This time of year, with Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's, with all the celebration, remembering the past, planning for the future, and setting new goals for our lives, think about how truly blessed you are.  And give thanks to the ONE who showers us with Heavenly Gifts.  They may not always seem to us to be blessings, but, All things work together for good and He Is In Control of ALL things.  He knows what we truly need.

Enough preaching.  I've said it before, though I will always take every possible opportunity to give Him Glory and tell of His Gift of Salvation for mankind, this forum is not really a good place for these discussions.  Internet communications can get so muddled up and there are too many diverse voices.  But, if you ever want to call, write, email, pm me and talk about my beliefs, I welcome the opportunity.  You know how to reach me.

He Is In Control, Have a Great Day,  Brent

In OR with Mom and Dad.  Stroke was worse than they had let on and yet not as bad as it could have been.  The 4-5 that he had over the past 2 years have affected the brain which has caused muscle weakness and dementia type disorientation, past memories, subconscious brain taking control so he does and says things that are not what he actually remembers thinking or saying, etc. 

But, the clot buster has worked wonders and he is actually doing very well.  Doesn't want me to do much work while we are here, just be together and spend time.  That is more than okay even though we both know there are things that should be done.

Don't be surprised if I don't show up much for the next week.  This time is obviously important to him and who knows....

Brought one of our grandsons, their first/oldest great-grandson with us.  Good time all around.

He Is In Control, Have a Great Day,  Brent

Update for all the faithful 'internet friends' who are genuinely concerned about our fellow members and their families.

Dad is not nearly as well as my Mom and sis portrayed him.  But, all things considered, for 84 and having a series of 4-5 strokes over the past two years that they didn't know about, he is doing pretty well.

BUT, adrenaline pumping because of Thanksgiving with family and my wife and I being there...by the 4th-5th day he was slowing down and by the time we left after being there for a week he was the worst I have ever seen him.  Even my Mom asked him if he thought he had had another stroke he was doing so bad that day.  But so was Mom.  Forgetting things.  Starting to get dad a coffee to go with his desert and then not remembering to finish pouring it and taking it to him.  Yep, it sure is golden getting up there into those late blooming days of our lives. 

But who can complain really?  84 glorious years with very little health concerns to cause problems.  A good job as a fire fighter and farmer/rancher.  A fairly comfortable retirement.  If this is his time...he is ready.  

Won't be surprised if Dad doesn't make it to next summer for their 60th anniversary.  But hoping so.

Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers.  They are appreciated.

He Is In Control, Have a Great Day,  Brent